Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
