First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
i think im in europe. pls send help
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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