i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
