i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
