i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize