People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
