I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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