grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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