haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
