"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I cut my penus on the lid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
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