i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
