so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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