Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
