Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I need moral support for this bender
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
