I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
false alarm, still single
Randomize
