THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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