I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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