all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
