I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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