her vagine was all disorganized.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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