Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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