I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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