Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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