I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
