He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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