He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
