its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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