yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
