a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
