Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
