i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
