i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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