take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Randomize
