WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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