it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
