You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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