I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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