therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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