yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Randomize
