Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
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