Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
