you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
