The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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