He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
