i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
