i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
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