of course. lets lasso hookers.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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