Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
