But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
