Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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