What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
