I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
