If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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